It's Saturday, and two days from now is Chinese New Year, and I'm here in the middle of it all to give you consistent cynical updates on all the holiday craziness!
Let's talk cleanliness. Everyone is doing "spring cleaning" this week, although the forecast is for snow and so the name is a bit off the mark. Chinese all clean their homes prior to the new year, and are forbidden by tradition to doing any cleaning on new year's day (they don't want to wash or sweep away their good fortune). China, unlike Japan, is not particularly known for its cleanliness. For some, it is the only time during the year that the home is thoroughly cleaned. I'm not one to judge. Every time I clean the house, Mimi sits by the front door to wait for whomever is coming over. 'Cause, according to her pea-sized yet accurate brain, I surely wouldn't be cleaning the house unless company was coming over.
Shopping is a huge big deal in the Middle Kingdom this week too. Case in point -- I went to the superstore day before yesterday and got rammed in the backside by innumerable grocery carts. It's kind of like they want to nudge you along, so as if you were some sort of bumper car, they just really and truly on purpose push their metal grocery cart into your backside! And, you know, most of the backsides over here are not well-padded, so getting one rammed by a metallic 4-wheeled vehicle hurts! If you turn around in annoyance and look the offender in the eye, they are appalled and embarrassed. They don't mean it as anything personal. They just want you to get out of their way so they can get out of the store so they can get home and clean house. And this is the way to do it. If this was America, people would be pulling out their cell phones and calling 911 to report bodily assault. But this isn't America, so we just deal with it the best we can.Sedatives.
(I'm pretending like the bumper car shopping experience only happens on CNY. But it happens almost every day of the week, year round, and I absolutely refuse to enter those stores on weekends when they are most crowded. I do not blame the people themselves for the crowding. It's not their fault that they live in the most populous country in the world. Everyone is just trying to survive as best they can.)
They look in my grocery cart to see what I am buying. Usually at that store, here's what they see:
(I buy my other stuff at less crowded market areas.)
They go grocery shopping every couple of days, and certainly assume I do too, so they look at the six-week's supply or dog food/bacon/chicken/etc. in my basket and think I am going to eat it all in three days and be back for more. They are not in the habit of freezing meat. I am misunderstood. They must think I have a big dog and ten kids that weigh 300 lbs each. But there's not much I can do about the inaccurate conclusions drawn by looking in my basket. I'm sure I draw a few inaccurate conclusions looking at their lives too.
For Chinese New Year, here's what they are buying at the superstore:
Let's talk cleanliness. Everyone is doing "spring cleaning" this week, although the forecast is for snow and so the name is a bit off the mark. Chinese all clean their homes prior to the new year, and are forbidden by tradition to doing any cleaning on new year's day (they don't want to wash or sweep away their good fortune). China, unlike Japan, is not particularly known for its cleanliness. For some, it is the only time during the year that the home is thoroughly cleaned. I'm not one to judge. Every time I clean the house, Mimi sits by the front door to wait for whomever is coming over. 'Cause, according to her pea-sized yet accurate brain, I surely wouldn't be cleaning the house unless company was coming over.
Shopping is a huge big deal in the Middle Kingdom this week too. Case in point -- I went to the superstore day before yesterday and got rammed in the backside by innumerable grocery carts. It's kind of like they want to nudge you along, so as if you were some sort of bumper car, they just really and truly on purpose push their metal grocery cart into your backside! And, you know, most of the backsides over here are not well-padded, so getting one rammed by a metallic 4-wheeled vehicle hurts! If you turn around in annoyance and look the offender in the eye, they are appalled and embarrassed. They don't mean it as anything personal. They just want you to get out of their way so they can get out of the store so they can get home and clean house. And this is the way to do it. If this was America, people would be pulling out their cell phones and calling 911 to report bodily assault. But this isn't America, so we just deal with it the best we can.
(I'm pretending like the bumper car shopping experience only happens on CNY. But it happens almost every day of the week, year round, and I absolutely refuse to enter those stores on weekends when they are most crowded. I do not blame the people themselves for the crowding. It's not their fault that they live in the most populous country in the world. Everyone is just trying to survive as best they can.)
They look in my grocery cart to see what I am buying. Usually at that store, here's what they see:
- dog food
- chicken
- ground beef
- bacon
(I buy my other stuff at less crowded market areas.)
They go grocery shopping every couple of days, and certainly assume I do too, so they look at the six-week's supply or dog food/bacon/chicken/etc. in my basket and think I am going to eat it all in three days and be back for more. They are not in the habit of freezing meat. I am misunderstood. They must think I have a big dog and ten kids that weigh 300 lbs each. But there's not much I can do about the inaccurate conclusions drawn by looking in my basket. I'm sure I draw a few inaccurate conclusions looking at their lives too.
For Chinese New Year, here's what they are buying at the superstore:
- Paper door decorations
- boxed food items to give as gifts when they visit homes of friends and family during the holiday -- think along the lines of fruit cakes.
- Food - they'll make a meal bigger than your Thanksgiving meal, and some grocery stores will be closed for 3-15 days, so they have to stock up.
Frankly, I don't care too much about what they are buying. But many of them are exceedingly interested in what is in my grocery cart. Some don't even try to hide their curiosity, they just bend over until their heads are in my basket where they can more easily scan the contents. So far no one has rifled through the cart with their hands to see what's at the bottom, though I'm pretty sure it wouldn't phase me if they did.
I am relieved that the pressures of the Chinese New Year holiday don't fall upon me as a foreigner. Christmas just ended, and I am not able to survive two major holidays of mammoth proportions within one month.
I am, however, bracing for a few sleepless nights in the coming week. The fireworks have already begun. And E the spectator will be giving you live reports, so check back again soon!
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